love bites.

you know when something bites you.. and it itches horribly? then you scratch it and it just gets worse. and harder to not itch? well i have a couple of love bites and ive been scratching the scars a lot lately. ive always written down how i feel or things that stick in my head-- things that stand out in every day life.

as i was sitting on kaitlyns couch last night, watching grey's anatomy, i thought that i could go smoke and read a little of my past. so i took out my old journal and started to read i had written late last year. i started noticing a pattern..

everytime i had some interest in a boy, i wrote more. i had more things to say about how life was so good. when i read things like: "im going to marry that boy. all of him.." about three different boys, i realized: i have issues. but then the further i went, the more i read.

direct quotes from good ol text messages.

and thats when you could tell that i was in awe of someone. the one that got me the most was from a boy that i wasnt even with for 2 months, but as far as i was concerned, i was going to marry him. and if you were to read this journal, youd think he felt the same way.

"im not changing who i am with. its me and you til you cheat or break up with me..
cuz i deff dont plan on it."
OR
"so baby, you have me til the day i die."

i must admit, as i was reading that, i laughed. because that relationship didnt even last 2 months. talk about getting a head of ourselves. but as much as i wrote about him and the quotes back and forth were proof of taylor swifts newest song: fifteen.

"cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you;
you're going to believe it."

aint that the truth? anywho, thats the way the kettle boils. its been on my mind a lot lately. i really didnt get too much closure with some of these things, so in a way, i think this is what i was looking for. my own type of closure. sharing with the worldwide web that i have issues for cute boys that are professional sweet-talkers(: as for me and my bites, well.. there is such thing as anti-itch cream, so im lathering it on and never looking back on these entries.

---

"Life is a series of pulls back and forth. You want to do one thing, but you're bound to do something else. Something hurts you, yet you know it shouldn't. You take certain things for granted, even when you know you should never take anything for granted. A tension of opposites, like a pull on a rubber band. And most of us live somewhere in the middle."

-Mitch Albom

Tuesdays with Morrie